— introduction to Macho Sluts by Pat Califia
I would like to see a community in which tops could gain status by having the guts to put their asses on the line and take a little of what they dish out. How can someone who has no idea what it feels like to be physically restrained or hurt know the value of what the bottom is giving them or calculate how much “punishment” to dole out?
Thanks to the women’s movement, we no longer believe that biology is destiny. But I sometimes wonder if we have not transferred many of our old gender patterns to the top/bottom dynamic. We sometimes forget that we assume S/M roles to gratify our fantasies. We still assume that being penetrated is a submissive act and sticking it in is dominant. Pleasure is still assumed to degrade and disenfranchise women. This sounds too much like the values of the New Christian Right to me. We’ve made a major improvement on heterosexist mores by insisting that the bottom can be a man or a woman, has control, has the right to consent or refuse, and should always get off. But I think we should be very challenging the very meanings that we assign all sexual acts. This is the truly radical potential of S/M. Are we frightened by the idea of having that much freedom?"
— The limits of the S/M relationship or Mr. Benson doesn’t live here anymore by Pat Califia
I’ve been busy with this story I’ve been writing. Every time I write, the pen seems to run out of ink as soon as I try to finish the ending. By the time I find a pen, the paper is unwilling to accept the new ink so I have to start over. The cute old man at the stationary store told me this would happen. I thought he was just trying to be silly and inspire me. I told him I had been working on a short story but wasn’t able to finish the ending becau